I Wish I Had a Pony

At this time of year, it seems like everyone’s making lists. There’s all the end of the year lists like Best Musical Comedies of 2006, Worst Movies Starring Colin Ferrell and Jamie Foxx, Stupidest Political Moments, and so on.

And then there are wish lists. Little kids are writing to Santa. Bigger kids are writing to Grandma. Boys tell their girlfriends. Girls tell everyone. I have known, for example, for two months that Reggie wants a video iPod for Christmas. She already has a regular one but she has to have one with video.

It’s not that I have anything against lists (Hello? I’m Mega Girl, the list queen). It’s the wishing part of it. Maybe I just never felt like whatever I put on a list I’d actually get. And not for nothing, but I’m pretty sure I knew Santa was a phony way before I turned five. Honest. It’s one of the perks of having an older sister. I knew a lot about a lot way earlier than other kids my age.

Certainly some of my lists could be construed as wish lists of sorts. My travel list, for instance, and my date list, for another. But again, I don’t seriously believe I will get to go to any of those places or date any of those guys. Reggie, on the other hand, will probably get her video iPod and she knows it.

What is the purpose of a wish list? Does having one make you feel like if you say your prayers every night and you do the right things, you will magically get those things? Or is it a reminder of goals you have set for yourself? Or is it to make you feel bad because you don't have those things and are unlikely to get them? If it’s the last, I say forget it. Keep your wishes to yourself. Don’t write them down and don’t tell anyone about them. I mean, who needs to be reminded of things you can never have?

As I look around the blogosphere and I listen to people at school, I have concluded wish lists fall into these categories:

Top 3.5 Wish Lists

1. Consumer Goods I’d Like to Have
2. People I’d Like to Date or Marry
3. People I’d Like to Look Like
3.5 Cars I’d Like to Own

Consumer goods are obvious: clothes, electronics, music, DVD’s, jewelry. I heard one kid wish for a George Foreman grill but that was kind of an unusual request. Not a lot of kids at my school are wishing for kitchen appliances.

People I’d Like to Date…self-explanatory. In fact, I talked about this last week.

People I’d Like to Look Like…now this is an interesting category. I can’t tell you how many people wish they looked like someone else. Usually someone famous, like Nicole Kidman or Jessica Simpson or Jennifer Lopez. I’m always hearing girls wishing they had so-and-so’s hair, so-and-so’s legs or butt or boobs. (Personally, I wouldn’t mind looking like Jennifer Aniston but that’s me…)

Cars get honorable mention because, while they are consumer goods, they seem to have their own subset of wishing, especially with boys. Or Reggie, who just put a 2007 Mustang on her wish list. (Keep wishing, babe. Sylvie told me you’re getting a Jetta when you turn 16. No sports cars.)

Bottom line: leave the wish lists to your little sister. And don’t tell her Santa isn’t real. Wait ‘til she hears about it herself. Let her be a kid for a little while longer.